“Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates close friends.” (Proverbs 17:9 NLT)
I love this thought because it reminds me that relationships and "love" grow when people forgive others faults. We all sometimes struggle holding onto the pain from the past that comes from what people say or do that wounds us. It's so easy to let bitterness “set up shop” in our hearts and poison every relationship in our lives. You think you are only mad at one person, but it ultimately spills over to others, as well. Forgiveness is not primarily an emotion. It is first a decision that you make to not "dwell" on the offense caused or bring it up to the offending person again. (This presumes the offense isn't something that specifically needs to be confronted according to Matt. 18:15.) Instead, you release the offense to God and discipline yourself to think on other things instead. As you do, the wounds fade into your memory banks and it stops being what is always on your mind. It's "dwelling" on the "fault" that stirs up the emotions inside us that produces the bitterness that ultimately poisons everything. This is not easy with some things that happen in life and the closer a person is to you the greater the difficulty in not dwelling on the offense. That’s why we need God’s grace and help to forgive! It's also important to mention that forgiveness doesn't mean you put yourself back into a situation to be hurt again in the same fashion by the same person. Of course, that assumes we're not talking about a family member or a very close friend! Those closest to us are going to hurt us, just as we will hurt them, at times. It's just the reality of living in relationships with people you care about and love. That's why we need to learn to forgive...so that "love" can "prosper." Lots of angry people in this world are wounded people carrying around the bitterness of past hurts. Let's not be part of that group!
