Friday, July 22, 2022

A Long Obedience

Eugene Peterson wrote a book in 1980 that is as relevant today as it was the year it was first published. Actually, it may be more relevant than it was 40 years ago. I think it would help all Christians to take the time to read it for themselves. But, I know that many people won’t or can’t do that, so let me quote a brief section from his introduction that he expounds throughout the book using the Psalms of Ascent (Ps. 120-134) as his text. 

Dr. Peterson writes, “One aspect of our world that I have been able to identify as harmful to Christians is the assumption that anything worthwhile can be acquired at once. We assume that if something can be done at all, it can be done quickly and efficiently. Our attention spans have been conditioned by thirty-second commercials. Our sense of reality has been flattened by thirty-page abridgments. It is not difficult in such a world to get a person interested in the message of the gospel; it is terrifically difficult to sustain the interest. Millions of people in our culture make decisions for Christ, but there is a dreadful attrition rate. Many claim to have been born again, but the evidence for mature Christian discipleship is slim. In our kind of culture anything, even news about God, can be sold if it is packaged freshly; but when it loses its novelty, it goes on the garbage heap. There is a great market for religious experience in our world; there is little enthusiasm for the patient acquisition of virtue, little inclination to sign up for a long apprenticeship in what earlier generations of Christians called holiness.


“Religion in our time has been captured by the tourist mindset. Religion is understood as a visit to an attractive site to be made when we have adequate leisure. For some it is a weekly jaunt to church; for others, occasional visits to special services. Some, with a bent for religious entertainment and sacred diversion, plan their lives around special events like retreats, rallies and conferences. We go to see a new personality, to hear a new truth, to get a new experience and so somehow expand our otherwise humdrum lives. The religious life is defined as the latest and the newest: Zen, faith healing, human potential, parapsychology, successful living, choreography in the chancel, Armageddon. We’ll try anything—until something else comes along. 


“I don’t know what it has been like for pastors in other cultures and previous centuries, but I am quite sure that for a pastor in Western culture at the dawn of the twenty-first century, the aspect of our world that makes the work of leading Christians in the way of faith most difficult is what Gore Vidal has analyzed as ‘today’s passion for the immediate and the casual.’ Everyone is in a hurry. The persons whom I lead in worship, among whom I counsel, visit, pray, preach and teach, want shortcuts. They want me to help them fill out the form that will get them instant credit (in eternity). They are impatient for results. They have adopted the lifestyle of a tourist and only want the high points. But a pastor is not a tour guide. [emphasis mine] I have no interest in telling apocryphal religious stories at and around dubiously identified sacred sites. The Christian life cannot mature under such conditions and in such ways.” —Peterson, Eugene H.; A Long Obedience in the Same Direction (The IVP Signature Collection) (pp. 9-11). InterVarsity Press. Kindle Edition. 


His title for the book comes from the proposition that following Christ is “a long obedience in the same direction.” (This quote has its roots in a 19th century statement from a German philosopher.) I don’t think I know of a better way to describe the Christian life than what this title proposes. We have to stop commercializing Christianity so that it fits in with the consumer mentality of the 21st Century. Following Jesus means more than finding a quick fix, a simple solution, an emotional high, instant spirituality, or gaining a few “brownie points” with God for eternity! It is about pressing on methodically, daily, patiently, thoughtfully, committedly, diligently, faithfully, unreservedly…taking time to get to know Christ in the ups and downs of our lives. It means obeying Him no matter what comes our way or how difficult it may be to do so. You can’t buy a seven day prescription of discipleship pills that will resolve all of your life problems. Neither can you pull through a spiritual drive-through and order “fast-food” spiritual maturity. I guess that’s why some professing Christians become disillusioned or distracted along this journey of spiritual growth. Following Christ as His child truly does require “a long obedience in the same direction.” It’s the reason we always encourage you to read your Bible consistently, gather with other believers at church weekly, share your faith with others faithfully, and keep praying earnestly! Let’s stop looking for a quick-fix spirituality that brings nothing but emotional highs. Let’s start living a faithful Christlike life that says, “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him…” (Job 13:15)! 


Thursday, December 10, 2020

Church Is Essential

What I'm about to say doesn't necessarily apply to everyone, but it needs to be said in a general fashion so everyone can think about it. Church ministry teams are hurting and missing opportunities to care for people and meet spiritual needs because people are "holed-up" in their "basements" and not willing to come out and help. Some people have conditions and/or are of an age that they should stay in awhile longer (though it's the aging folks that often show up in spite of the virus because they know the importance of the church). But, I'm pained by otherwise healthy people misusing the command to "love your neighbor," as if it means we can stay locked up in our "cocoons" until all the trouble passes over. (Of course, it's OK to go to work, school, grocery store, big box stores, restaurants, vacation, etc.) "Loving your neighbor" SHOULD mean we get out of our "basements" to help people and meet them in SAFE ways...like we do at our church. The command Jesus gave was an active one, not a passive one. The Good Samaritan was the example Jesus used about how to obey that specific command. The Samaritan got OUT OF (!!) his comfort zone, did something that was dangerous, sacrificed himself for someone else, offered his own resources to help...etc. etc. (It's a good thing Jesus didn't take the approach that some believe is the "spiritual" thing to do. Had He done so, we'd still be lost in our sin!) People should wear their masks, socially distance, wash their hands, but people are hurting and dying right now that don't have COVID-19! There are too many that have died from the virus and my heart is sad/broken for their families. We have had a dear lady die from our church with the virus and my heart aches every...single...day for that sweet, godly family! Having said that, there are more people dying from other things than the virus that are going into eternity without any hope...while we say we are protecting "them" from contracting the virus. It feels very much like we've become focused on saving our own lives rather than helping to save the "eternal lives" of others. God isn't going to make an exemption to Heaven for those that needed the Gospel or His loving care but didn't receive it because of a pandemic. I don't think He's going to say, "Well, you lived during 2020 and those circumstances will allow you special entry into Heaven." God's church can't wait till the pandemic fully ends to go back to active ministry. If the past 10 months have reminded me of anything, it is that the church is ESSENTIAL to people's lives. If it isn't "essential" to some Christians and they can be content staying home in their jammies, that speaks volumes about where churches are spiritually. Every Christian needs the gathering of believers, even in a pandemic! Besides, a lot of people aren't going to take the vaccine, so I guess they'll just stay home forever. We have people coming to services and struggle to fully care for them because we only have a skeleton crew showing up to serve. How about "loving your neighbor" by serving alongside others at church and lending them some help? Why do we use the command of scripture and just apply it to the spread of the virus. A lot of really good people are giving everything right now and are hurting because they don't have enough hands or hearts to love the people that are coming to be loved with the love of Jesus! It's time we take reasonable precautionary measures and then get to work. Lives are depending on it and their eternal destinies hang in the balance

Thursday, November 26, 2020


There is much to be thankful for on this 2020 Thanksgiving Day. It seems that too often we're only thankful when life feels good and everything seems to be working perfectly. However, if we look deeply enough, we can find reasons to be grateful even if there are challenges we have to endure. Actually, behind almost every problem we face is an opportunity to see God's goodness, His provision and/or His plan being worked out for us. 


So, on this holiday, instead of giving thanks for only the things we think are thank-worthy, let's look at everything in our lives and find reasons to give praise to God! Think differently about your life and see how God is blessing you, even if the blessings come with challenges. Let me show you what I mean... 


  • Let's give thanks for the taxes we pay...because it means we are employed.
  • Let's give thanks for the clothes that fit a bit too snugly...because it means we have had plenty to eat.
  • Let's be thankful for a lawn that needs mowing, windows that need cleaning and gutters that need fixing...because it means we have a home.
  • Let's be thankful for the parking spot we find at the far end of the lot...because it means we're capable of walking. 
  • Let's be thankful for our huge heating/cooling bill...because it means we are comfortable at home.
  • Let's be thankful for all the complaining we hear about our government...because it means we have freedom of speech.
  • Let's be thankful for the person behind us in church who sings off key...because it means that we can hear.
  • Let's be thankful for the piles of laundry...because it means our loved ones are nearby.
  • Let's be thankful for the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours...because it means we have a job.
  • Let's be thankful for weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day...because it means we are alive.


And, the list could go on!! In all we do we can find reason to give thanks today and everyday for the goodness of God to us, if we only take the time to look beyond the surface struggles to see what most other people totally miss! 


"Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his faithful love endures forever." (Psalm 107:1)




 

Sunday, October 18, 2020

Being Vulnerable During Covid-19

These past 24 weeks have been filled with so many ups and downs that it’s hard for me to keep my equilibrium. After a wonderful beginning to 2020 in January and February we were met with the lockdowns due to the covid-19 virus. For ten long weeks, beginning March 22nd, we had one virtual service each Sunday morning with some additional virtual content we provided daily and weekly. Not until May 31st were we able to reopen our church buildings and then only with many precautions that were required and are still being required. After preaching online for those several weeks, it didn’t matter to me how many adjustments we had to make to be together again. All of the effort to gather as the church was well worth the hard work in order to be under one roof to worship God as a church family. The ensuing  weeks since May 31st,  through the summer and early fall, have also been filled with many emotional ups and downs. Those early weeks of the regathering started slowly, but we seemed to build a little each week, even if the numbers in attendance didn’t always reflect it. There was a feeling that we could gather as the church safely and we were becoming adjusted to our new “safe” routine. Of course, we had people taking vacations and getting away after being kept home except for essential activities and work. And, as the fall arrived, I had great hopes that we would begin to regain our momentum that was lost earlier in March and start seeing more people show up again to worship on the weekends. But, though our numbers grew some, we still didn’t see the return that I hoped we might see. We are averaging about half (or a little more) of the attendance we had prior to the pandemic, but I don’t think we are going to get back anywhere near 90% or 95% of what we had prior to the shutdown anytime soon. I have mixed emotions about what we are going through. On the one hand I understand that some people should definitely not come out until this virus is more under control. On the other hand, I am disappointed that others haven’t begun to re-join us weekly. Is it their concern for catching the virus that is keeping them away? Or, is it a whole lot of “convenience”  wrapped in a little bit of “fear” that is preventing them from venturing out to the gatherings? I see people that aren’t quarantining from other places like stores, malls, restaurants, games, etc., but who won’t venture out to be a part of their local church. In some ways I think the last several months of pushing our online services has increased the desire in some people for the church to primarily meet online.  However, that isn’t what a church does or how the Bible defines the role of the church. Meeting together is central to how a church functions in scripture and we are even commanded not to forsake the assembling of believers. When much of the church is not gathering together, it feels a little like having half your physical body not showing up for work on any given day. It cripples you or, at least, handicaps you for an extended period of time. We have been operating with a skeleton staff compared to the number that were helping prior to the pandemic. The pressure is on a few serving when we need to spread out the responsibility because “many hands make for light work.” Add to these things the fact that we are dealing with the wrangling over masks or no masks. Some won’t come because a few (very, very few) don’t wear a mask and others won’t come because we ask them to wear a mask. It all sounds so crazy to me and there is no way any pastor or church could have ever expected to be battling these kinds of issues a year ago. Christians disagreeing with one another over a piece of cloth or paper covering their nose and mouth? I fully understand why some are staying home, if they are sick or have underlying health issues. But, otherwise healthy individuals quarantining from the church when they aren’t doing so elsewhere is painful and hard to understand. I believe that as a pastor I should be eternally optimistic and filled with faith! I am both of these things. I believe that God’s purpose is being worked out even in difficult circumstances and I know that His church will survive (and thrive), no matter how long this pandemic lasts. But, my concern is what this is doing right now to Christians and their children as I watch some drifting away from the faith and excusing it (maybe not even recognizing it) while using the covid-19 virus as their cover. What is God showing us right now? What is He doing in His church during these days? Is He shaking the “boat” to loosen the grip of those just “hanging on” so that we can eventually sail powerfully into the days ahead? Is He growing us and teaching us that our confidence can’t be in people, but only in Him? These are just a few of the many questions that have been floating around in my head for weeks now. I pray every day for strength and wisdom to maneuver through this maze of challenges to lead His church into the future. I know He is hearing me and I pray we will soon see His answers. All I want is to see people saved and growing in devotion to Jesus Christ.

Tuesday, July 07, 2020

One Pastor's Perspective...

Just one pastor’s perspective (mine): This lengthy process of dealing with Covid-19 has been the most challenging period I have had to maneuver in 42 years of ministry. Ministry always presents obstacles and opportunities you have to overcome and navigate. But, there has never been anything like this present challenge. Everything in you says that the work of the church must move forward, but daily the resistance to making progress in that direction becomes increasingly more difficult and hard to overcome. So little is known about this virus and the regularly changing mandates are frustrating, to say the least. And, that’s not to mention the differing viewpoints from equally qualified scientists that only lead to people’s differing viewpoints about the virus. There is no way to completely fulfill the mission of His church when we are unable to meet regularly. Add to that the understandable fact that so few feel confident to venture out to services and you find yourself challenged with how to stay connected with them, as well as how to do what the New Testament commands us to do as a church body. “Forsake not the assembling of ourselves together” isn’t a suggestion, it’s a command. Being together accomplishes things that can never be fully realized through online services. I’m thankful for the opportunity to be able to continue sharing Biblical teaching and encouragement online, but the accountability needed for developing deep spiritual life is missing. Discipleship best takes place in person, not online. A drift is already taking place as some people become adjusted to “worship” at home and it becomes increasingly more commonplace. It’s too easy to tune in the service and tune out what God is really saying (i.e., we become consumers of "spiritual goods").  Add to these things the way some Christians have turned on each other over masks, six feet distancing, dismissal from services by sections, separate entrance/exit patterns, and dozens of other similar matters, there is a growing disunity that can sometimes be palpably felt among segments of church communities everywhere. Too often we look at others as if they are unloving for not doing exactly what is requested by the church to protect those in attendance. Or, we feel disconcerted, thinking others are being duped by the government into surrendering their constitutional rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Add to all this the growing number of conspiracy theories about our current situation and you sometimes feel like you are sinking deeper into a quagmire of complete irrationality. None of these aforementioned matters take into account other types of things such as the difficulty of singing with a mask (singing is a mandate in worship), feeling close to people you can’t touch or get within six feet (fellowship/relationship), being able to baptize new believers (a church ordinance), etc., etc. Just so you know, preaching to a camera is one kind of difficult, but preaching to faces you can barely see is another kind of difficult altogether. And, when you are in a service where the pews are nearly full and when they are barely full, there is a totally different experience to the worship services (For you sports fans, it is the difference between a stadium full for the game and one that is almost empty. The game gets played, but there is a completely different experience in the two different settings.). My observation is that some people are already drifting spiritually as they are kept from worship services by the legitimate concerns about the virus. New patterns of life on Sunday are being developed that will affect a lot of Christians for more than just the time we have to deal with this virus. Some of these things may not be rectified even when a vaccine is developed. And, there will be a host of people that won’t take the vaccine for a variety of reasons...some legitimate and others not so much. If these challenges only lasted for a few weeks then the impact would be somewhat limited, but we are looking at the end of the year or longer before the vaccine or therapeutics are developed. This whole situation is having significant temporal impact on businesses, schooling and personal lives that will last for years to come. It is also having a significant impact on the spiritual lives of people that will have long term ETERNAL consequences. Just consider the children and the worship patterns they are developing during these difficult times. I could go on like this... My desire in writing is to say we need God’s help! Those of us in ministry need your prayers as we try to keep the mission of Christ in the forefront and keep people growing in grace. Unity among believers isn’t a suggestion, it’s a matter of obedience! Our churches need your support financially to maintain the work that has been done so that when the day comes that we are together again as the “whole” church we don’t have to dig out of a financial hole that further hinders us from getting up to ministry/mission speed quickly. Hang in there with me, church. We are doing all we can to reach you, love you and lead you. We are trying hard to get the Gospel out as best we can while we wait on the Lord for His help. Our culture is in decline as the darkness engulfs our communities. The church is to be the light in the darkness, even if we can’t meet together as freely as we’d like! Don’t lose faith! Don’t leave the straight and narrow path of following Jesus! Don’t neglect your church family! Don’t be divisive, but love one another. This will pass and we WILL REBUILD!  God still has a plan for all of this we face right now!!
x

Friday, June 05, 2020

A Word From The Wise (i.e., Solomon)...

“Interfering in someone else’s argument is as foolish as yanking a dog’s ears.” (Proverbs 26:17 NLT) 


I've come to the last of my thirty-one thoughts for thirty-one days from the thirty-one chapters of Proverbs.There is so much more in this book to be discovered, so keep reading it and pondering it's wisdom from yourself. It is precisely the kind of proverb we are considering today that is the primary reason I love reading the book regularly. 


I’ve never pulled a dog’s ears, but I assume it wouldn’t have a good outcome. Of course, the obvious response of the dog is the reason he uses this analogy. Dogs in the ancient world were not as domesticated as today. They were mostly wild, more like jackals. Consequently, you were making trouble for yourself when you aggravated a dog and it was your fault if you got bitten (like getting stung because you poked the hornet's nest). It could even be deadly, if the dog had rabies. This proverb basically says that we should stay out of other people’s arguments and you won’t get hurt. Interfere in other people’s fights and you might get "punched"! I’d go a step further and say, stay out of everybody’s “business” in general (whatever it is) unless they invite you in to help them. As an example of what I’m saying, I have a love/hate relationship with social media and this proverb expresses some of my reasoning. Why does everybody have to know everybody else’s business? It only invites people into things where they really don't need to be. Of course, there are times when it can be a positive influence, but I’ve seen so many negatives, as well. I love it when people post pictures of their families or travels online. Or, they use social media to encourage, edify and spread the truth of God's Word! Anyway, it’s usually best to “mind your own business” and pay attention to the things going on in your own world. (Please read Prov. 20:3!) Paul put it this way, “Make it your goal to live a quiet life, MINDING YOUR OWN BUSINESS and working with your hands, just as we instructed you before. Then people who are not believers will respect the way you live, and you will not need to depend on others.” (1 Thessalonians 4:11-12) There is a world full of busybodies that think they have a right to "get all up in everybody's business." You’ve probably met him/her...always asking probing questions about private matters, sharing an opinion about something that's not even their concern, or telling you something “juicy” about another person. I can’t help but scratch my head sometimes wondering how they know the things they are passing along. As we know, what a lot of people pass along is usually something less than edifying and mostly gossip. People seem to love prying into other people’s business and occasionally I’ve had to ask someone to politely “butt out!” I have never thought it was a good idea to "yank" a "dog's ears" and Solomon agrees!  

Thursday, June 04, 2020

A Word From The Wise (i.e., Solomon)...

“As the beating of cream yields butter and striking the nose causes bleeding, so stirring up anger causes quarrels.” (Proverbs 30:33 NLT)  

This proverb actually advises people to strive for peace and harmony through humility and righteousness. I know it doesn’t say it that way, but that’s the essence of the proverb. It does this by reminding us that when you agitate people, you end up “stirring up [their] anger” and that only leads to “quarrels." The first two illustrations in this verse show how “beating” and “striking” both get specific responses. So, irritating and/or provoking someone is going to make that person mad and bring on the responses of "quarrels" and contentions. Again, it’s sort of back to a another proverb that says, “A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.” (Prov. 15:1) Being able to avoid an argument or keep from making it worse is the mark of a mature believer. Sure, there are times when you have to confront problems and get unpleasant matters resolved. However, most of the time when you force the conversation or pursue it at the wrong times it only amplifies the problems that already exist. If someone is pushing (“stirring”) you and you feel your temper rising, the best thing you can do is to ask them to wait until a later, set time to discuss the matter. Then, get away and gain your composure and prepare to talk about the “problem” and not attack the person. Anger will almost always make us attack the person rather than the problem. Nothing constructive ever comes from doing so and it usually degenerates into something even worse than the original problem. Another way to say it is, “Don’t push the other person’s proverbial buttons.” I see this a lot in relationships where couples know that certain things they say or do are going to “get under the skin" of the other person. Sometimes it’s intentional and they want to “stir up anger.”  At other times it’s accidental and completely unintended. Again, we have to be able to sit down and resolve issues in a mature fashion. For instance, in a relationship, one person can’t always have his/her way to the exclusion of the other person. A marriage relationship is a partnership that requires two adults being able to learn each others strengths and weaknesses so they can help the other person become better. Sometimes there are things that have to be resolved in a manner that accommodates all persons involved, but it will almost never happen when you are “stirring up anger” rather than maintaining a calm, cool composure. Things to remember:
  • You are responsible for how “YOU treat” others.
  • You are also responsible for how “YOU react” to others who mistreat you.
Responding in an appropriate fashion takes growing in Christ and with it, you get better with proper actions/responses over time. We all have to work at this because it doesn’t come naturally. It takes God’s help!

Wednesday, June 03, 2020

A Word From The Wise (Solomon)...

“Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but trusting the Lord means safety.” (Proverbs 29:25 NLT


Every time I read this verse the first thing I think of is peer pressure. Different people deal differently with peer pressure. And, it’s not just something kids and teenagers have to confront. At every level of life there is peer pressure and “fearing people” makes us all do some funny things at times. Maybe there's not a way to totally avoid peer pressure, but recognizing its power against you is a major step forward. Of course, I’m speaking of peer pressure when it’s toward the negatives rather than the positives in life. Peer pressure can have a good effect when it’s caused by people that are moving in the right direction. That’s one reason a church is so vitally important in every believer’s life. Among fellow believers you find godly peer pressure that helps you follow God. We can’t always help who is around us, but we can always help how they influence us...for good or bad. I think helping our children learn to recognize peer pressure and know how to respond to it is one of the really important things we teach our children. Helping them choose their friends wisely and showing them how to be leaders are also part of the process of childrearing. Most children are followers by nature rather than leaders and that’s OK. It’s just that we have to teach them what to do when they are pressured to do something they have been taught not to do...or vice versa. It’s in those moments that they are going to have to lead rather than follow. And, they are definitely going to feel peer pressure at times. We ALL feel it at times! I have been in circumstances where I had to make the decision whether I would do what I knew was right or whether I would cave to the pressure placed on me. When we find ourselves in those situations, we have to take refuge in the “safety” the Lord gives. Inevitably those that are pressuring us to do something we really don’t want to do or know we shouldn’t do...will only turn up the pressure. It may be for a time we'll be the butt of every joke they make, but God will be pleased when we do right for His glory. My experience is that whenever I made the right choice to push back against negative peer pressure that the end result was the feeling of peace rather than guilt from giving into it. 

Tuesday, June 02, 2020

A Word From The Wise (i.e., Solomon)...

“Blessed are those who fear to do wrong, but the stubborn are headed for serious trouble.” (Proverbs 28:14 NLT) 

I’m not sure if there are very many people that “fear” to do wrong anymore. It seems like “anything goes” and most people aren’t ashamed to flaunt their evil. Actually, most of them don’t even consider it as evil! I'm concerned about the things our children and grandchildren will be exposed to in the years to come. Part of the problem is that people are shortsighted and don’t understand that even if you get away with something here, it doesn’t mean you won’t answer for it when you stand before God. Our society has thrown off all restraint in the pursuit of their sinful passions. This proverb says that the one who is “blessed” is the one that fears “to do wrong.” They have an understanding of eternal things and know the eternal God. They know the consequences are more than temporary, they may well be eternal. We can’t stop what society around us does, but we can personally live in light of what we know to be the truth about God. A healthy dose of “fear” is good in the believer's life. This is not the fear of losing your salvation, but fear of meeting Christ knowing that you have flaunted His ways, His will and His Word. While the believer is assured of being with Christ in Heaven, there is still the reality of the Judgment Seat of Christ. It’s there that our works will be examined as to whether they were worthy of our Savior and whether we followed His instructions. Some of them will be rewarded, but others will result in our “suffer[ing] loss.” (cf. I Corinthians 3:15) We need to ask God to make us sensitive to things that displease Him and to convict us when we are wrong. We simply don’t want to go on in our “stubbornness” and meet the consequences of doing life our way. Maybe our society doesn’t know right from wrong anymore, but those of us that know Jesus have no excuse. We have a Bible that explains what God requires of us and it’s our lifelong task to learn what it says so we can do right. We must filter everything we do through the truth of scripture. Ask yourself often, “What does God say about this?” Don’t trust your emotions to make decisions in areas where you don’t know if God has something to say about a matter. Christianity seems restrictive to some people, but God knows what is best for us...now and when we meet Him in Heaven. We might talk our way out of some things here, but that won’t happen in His presence!

Monday, June 01, 2020

A Word From The Wise (i.e., Solomon)...

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” (Proverbs 27:17 NLT) 

There’s nothing like a true friend that won’t just tell you what you want to hear, but will tell you what you “need” to hear. A lot of people will never make the effort to develop these kinds of godly friendships that have that level of trust. Our spouses are our first and most important friends! They should have the right to speak into our lives anything that we need to hear. It’s always difficult to hear constructive criticism from a family member, but they know us better than anyone else and see things no one else sees. They also love us more than anyone else will ever love us. But, there must be others to whom we give access to our lives and can speak the truth to us in love. I’m not suggesting we need a lot of these types of friends, but everybody that wants to live godly needs some. I suggest that some of these friendships be with older, godly people and not just those who are our peers. There is nothing like having someone in our lives that has the wisdom of experience, as well as biblical insight, that we can consult when needed. We might also be surprised how much we help that older friend, not just how much he/she helps us. The best place to build these friendships is in a local church setting! Friendships like these can’t be forced, but usually develop naturally out of spending time with other people seeking God. It’s not like we go to somebody and say, “Will you be my friend?” The friendships I’m talking about develop over time and happen naturally. As your friendship grows we give these individuals increasing privileges to say to us whatever needs to be said. We don’t have to accept everything they say or tell us to do, but it’s helpful to hear an outside perspective. It needs to be people that love us enough to encourage our walk with God and aren't afraid to tell us when you get “too close to the edge.” There’s also the larger body of friends like many of us have in a Life Group or Sunday School class that become invaluable to us along our faith journey. They share life together with us and encourage us to be faithful to the Lord in a less personal way. We just need people along the journey of life to help us stay true to our faith. We all have a tendency to drift spiritually and “a friend sharpens a friend” by helping us stay focused on the Lord and the right way to live.